Facebook: The good, the bad and the Face Palms!

As a writer, I depend on Facebook for shares and visibility. Wearing another hat as a spiritual medium, I depend on Facebook to link with clients and to spread hope, guidance and love from the world of Spirit. When I’m just being Sandra Piddock, I depend on Facebook to keep in contact with friends and family. Oh and keep up with what’s going on locally, nationally and globally of course. I love it – and I hate it!

When I first joined Facebook back in 2008, I had a really good reason to do so. We’d just bought a place in Spain, and we planned to divide our time between the Costa Blanca and the Costa Fortune. Otherwise identified as the West Country of England, where we still have lots of friends and family. It was a great way to keep in touch across the miles, without running up a telephone bill of, well, telephone number proportions.

As I got more exposure as a writer and set up my own website, Facebook became a good way to share content and bring new readers to my website. And of course, I could also set up a companion Facebook page. New posts got shared right away, and I could pass on little snippets to keep my readers interested as they eagerly awaited the Next Big Blog Post. Once I began working as a medium, I set up another Facebook page to keep the spiritual stuff separate from my other writing.

Facebook does a lot of good for a lot of people. It also causes a lot of problems for a lot of people. And frequently, it shows a side of humanity where the only possible reaction is a good old face palm. What follows is a brief personal overview, based on my own experiences and observations.

Lost people and pets

The good: Facebook enjoys global reach. When someone is in the distressing situation of having a two or four legged family member go missing, extensive sharing by friends, friends of friends and groups can get them safely home. Often, this happens much sooner than anyone could expect.

The bad: Some people just can’t resist adding their two cents, even if they aren’t in a position to help with the search. They pass judgment by assuming the missing person must have had problems at home to disappear, or inflame passions by saying things like,’It’s only a dog/cat, why all the fuss?’ Then the thread is swamped in negativity, and the original poster winds up even more distressed as a result.

The face palm: Aunty Mabel goes missing in Manchester, with no luggage, no money and certainly no passport. So why does the ‘friend of a friend’ think it would be helpful to post in missing persons groups in America, Australia and Albania? She’s 97, with dementia, and her next of kin are not minted, so it’s safe to say she hasn’t taken a surprise trip, been kidnapped or sold into prostitution. Check the locations before you share.

Making new friends – or tracing old ones

The good: Facebook is a great place to make new friends, or even track down Tracey who used to sit next to you in school. And it makes Mike’s day when he stumbles across Jim. They used to go fishing together every Saturday until Jim and his family moved 200 miles away.

The bad: People change. Tracey might have married a millionaire, or may not even remember your name. And your memories may be coloured by nostalgia, so you forget the things about her that used to rattle your chain big time. If you haven’t heard from someone for 30 years or more, is it really such a good idea to get in touch again?

By the way Mike, Jim didn’t ‘forget’ to contact you with his new address. His wife told him not to, because she hated spending Saturdays on her own with the kids. Even worse, your wife had a habit of popping around for a quick cuppa just as she was about to binge watch Emmerdale on catch up.

The face palm: Facebook is not – repeat not – a dating site. I’ve had men of all ages befriend me on the back of mutual friendships with others, or by liking lots of my posts, then they’ve tried to arrange a date. They’ve professed undying love after a quick shufty on my profile, then gone all offended on me when I tell them to go away – or something similar. Even if they were George Clooney lookalikes – and they definitely are not – I’m not going to agree to meet up with a man just because he thinks I should, because I’m on Facebook and post publicly.

Groups and likes

The good: I belong to and follow quite a few groups and pages – writing, local information, spiritual stuff, dog lovers, to name but a few. It’s great to get together with like minded people and exchange support, advice and practical hacks and fixes. It can be very rewarding, and it can enhance your enjoyment of all kinds of hobbies, interests and vocational and professional topics.

The bad: A group or page may be just what you want or need. But it won’t suit someone else, so never add people to groups, or ask them to like pages unless you know for sure they’ll get something out of it. Inactive members give false indicators of the success or otherwise of a group or page, so don’t add without asking.

The face palm: Sellers, spammers and scammers just join groups to promote their own businesses and/or recruit people for pyramid selling schemes or commission only jobs. If you admin a Facebook page or group, check on member requests to keep your site on topic and don’t allow the news feed to get backed up with adverts. Ask yourself why someone who already belongs to over 1,000 groups – yes, I kid you not – wants to join your group or page.

So there are my top Facebook likes, dislikes and frustrations. That said, Facebook is a very useful resource for recreation, business, and keeping in touch with those who need to know what’s happening in your life. Run each post through your mind, and if it’s not a true reflection of you and the message you want to convey, start again. Keep it tight, keep it light, and don’t be the cause of a Facebook Face Palm among your followers. You know it makes sense!